In his memoir, The House of Hidden Meanings, RuPaul opens up about his tumultuous journey, revealing details about his childhood, complicated relationships, addiction, and rise to stardom. He is incredibly candid, addressing issues that many memoirs tend to avoid, as he believes it’s essential to share the whole story, the good and the bad. For RuPaul, sharing his full journey was crucial for understanding his path and the challenges he overcame. He recalls his early love for memoirs, reading about Hollywood stars as a child and wanting to know everything about their lives, both the highs and lows.

RuPaul’s childhood was far from easy, and his relationship with his parents was especially complicated. He details how the fractured bond with his father impacted his romantic relationships later in life. Despite the difficult history, he shares that therapy, recovery, and sobriety ultimately allowed him to forgive his father. He also reflects on how his mother, who held onto grudges, struggled emotionally, ultimately manifesting cancer due to her inability to let go of past pain. RuPaul learned valuable lessons from her struggles, particularly about the importance of emotional release and forgiveness.

Another significant part of his memoir is his openness about his battle with addiction. He shares how addiction to crystal meth dominated parts of his life, making every day a cycle of seeking high, partying, and crashing. Despite this, RuPaul has been sober for 25 years, crediting his sobriety to a 12-step program and the support of his friends. He recounts his rock bottom at 28 when he was living on his younger sister’s couch with no money, but it was his friends in New York who reminded him of his worth and encouraged him to pursue his dreams. This moment was a pivotal one, and RuPaul compares it to the moment in The Wizard of Oz when Dorothy tells the Scarecrow, “I think I’m going to miss you the most.” It’s clear that his friends were his lifeline during that time.

In 1994, RuPaul met his future husband, George LaBar, and the two married in 2017. RuPaul explains their open marriage, stating that he would never want to put restrictions on someone he loves so deeply. Their relationship, though unconventional, works for them, and he reveals that it was George’s struggles with addiction that ultimately led RuPaul to seek help, though the couple’s relationship wasn’t the reason he went into recovery.

Throughout his memoir, RuPaul emphasizes the importance of finding a tribe—people who support you and help you become the best version of yourself. His career in show business, which spans over 43 years, has not been easy, but it’s been worth it. He credits RuPaul’s Drag Race with allowing him to continue doing what he loves, traveling the world, and staying creatively fulfilled. The show has been a major part of his career, with 17 seasons under its belt and numerous international spin-offs. RuPaul remains a dynamic force in the entertainment industry, still hosting Drag Race and continuing to work on new projects.

Finally, RuPaul reflects on his distinctive look, which he describes as a blend of “a black hooker and a Soul Train dancer,” mixing elements of icons like Cher, Diana Ross, and Dolly Parton. His unique appearance has been a defining factor in his career, allowing him to stand out and inspire countless people who admire his boldness and authenticity. As he continues to evolve in his career, RuPaul’s message to others is clear: embrace who you are, find your tribe, and always strive to be the best version of yourself.