In a recent conversation with comedian and author Chelsea Handler, I couldn’t help but fangirl a little after reading her latest book. It felt like we were the black-and-white versions of each other, and I was amazed by how many parallels there were in our lives. Although we grew up differently, we share similar philosophies and have followed a similar life path. Chelsea casually revealed that she is two weeks older than me, and we both just celebrated turning 50. We shared a lighthearted “Happy Birthday” moment, and I asked her how she felt about hitting this milestone.
Chelsea seemed genuinely excited about turning 50, embracing it with gratitude and pride. She explained that unlike others, she doesn’t lie about her life and is proud of everything she’s accomplished. Still, she mentioned a moment of introspection when she realized that at 50, she was unmarried and childless. This led her to question what happiness meant for her and whether her life choices made her “less of a woman.” It’s a thought many women likely experience at some point, especially in a society that often defines a woman’s worth by her relationships or motherhood.
But Chelsea’s perspective was powerful. She firmly believes that being a woman is about much more than being a wife or a mother. She said, “I think it makes you more of a woman” to live your life authentically, even if it doesn’t align with traditional expectations. Chelsea also pointed out that not having her own family has allowed her to impact more people’s lives, especially children, as she can devote time and energy to others. She’s able to focus on her work, write books, and speak her mind—all things she’s proud of. For Chelsea, living a full life isn’t about fulfilling society’s standards; it’s about recognizing and embracing her strengths and making a positive impact on others.
Our conversation shifted to the broader social landscape, where Chelsea highlighted the strength and power of women, even amidst challenging times. She acknowledged the obstacles women face, but she emphasized that the current challenges stem from the fear that powerful women instill in men, particularly those in positions of power. Despite the adversity, she believes women are more empowered than ever, and she’s confident that women’s strength and resilience are undeniable. We are not going anywhere, she asserted.
Reflecting on relationships, Chelsea shared the traits she values most in a partner. For her, it’s important that her partner respects her strength and independence. She doesn’t need extravagant gifts or lavish vacations. What truly matters to her is finding someone who adds value to her life—someone honest, kind, and supportive. She looks for qualities like decency, empathy, and the ability to listen. These traits, she said, are far more important to her than material displays of love or wealth. For Chelsea, relationships are about mutual respect and connection, not superficial gestures.
Lastly, she addressed the constant rumors about her love life, particularly the one involving actor and comedian Rines. Chelsea laughed at the idea of getting married to him, clarifying that they simply went from one party to another together. Despite the internet’s imagination, there’s no truth to the idea that they’re romantically involved.
Through it all, Chelsea emphasized the importance of being true to oneself and never letting society’s standards define who you are. As women, we can achieve our dreams on our own terms, and that’s exactly what Chelsea Handler has done.
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